Consistency is not my forte, but I’m back, a little less aimless, a little more inspired. I feel the same way towards work, but I’m doing little things to address my burnout.
I didn’t have an epiphany, I didn’t make some life-altering decision to quit. I’ve always been more of a slow burn (no pun intended) person, risk-averse, and you know what, I’m accepting that about myself.
What have I been up to? Well, still looking for my spark: I have a half-baked business idea that I hope will be ready to share here (even though I expect no traffic lol) next week; I started drafting the outline for my Romance-with-a-capital-R novel, and I’m taking art classes. Like I said, consistency isn’t exactly my forte so it’s necessary to do so much for something to stick 😉 Let’s add blogging to the list.
If you recall, I got started on an anti-depressant a couple months ago, and I’m happy to report that it still works, confirmed not placebo. It’s kind of indescribable, a little bit like life on easy mode? I think more clearly, I articulate my thoughts, I do things in a linear fashion, and my focus is tight. Anxiety used to pull my chest taut, sideline my day with endless rumination. Now it’s a mild annoyance. It’s kind of amazing. Even my period can’t stop me.
I took the entire week off for the fourth of July weekend and spent it with family, the beach, and friends. I did all the things I wanted, and treated it like a staycation. Patriotism was a little difficult to stomach (ok, I’m outing myself as a coastal liberal), but the fireworks were loud, bright and incessant like usual — a comfort in itself.
I try not to dwell on things too much these days, or maybe I’m able to let worries pass more easily. I get excited about things, like class, or my bed (I bought a new mattress, it’s fabulous). Taking everything so personally was such a drag.
Ok, keeping it short & sweet, signing off — is this sunset better than the last?
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